Still Processing

I went to see the endocrinologist this morning.  I had good news and bad news.  While the walking has helped, I've lost nine pounds since I started blogging, my blood glucose levels are consistantly too high first thing in the morning.  Dr. Chenney says that means my body isn't producing enough insulin to get me through the night.  I asked her if losing more weight would help and she said maybe if I got up in the middle of the night and ran for five miles I could help my body manage it, but realistically she feels I need a little insulin to get me through the night.  I thought she maxed me out on meds four weeks ago but she is adding an additional 30 miligrams of actos a day.  So that makes three different meds just for the diabetes.  I'm really bummed and feel a little helpless.

    After talking with Jackie tonight I feel hopeful.  She is such an encouragement.  She told me to keep working at it. She said that I am still young and have a lot going for me physically and nothing is for sure when it comes to our health.  Our bodies are a mystery and have the ability to heal themselves.  I love talking with her she really lifts me up and gives me hope.  I have no doubts that God is the one who put the desire to be a nurse in Jackie's heart he has given her such an encouraging spirit.  She makes me feel like I have a lot of hope and makes me want to work at it even harder!  I love you Jackie!!

Garage Sale!

Just rewards!

It's on the record that I have said in the past.  "I will never have another Yard sale, tag sale, garage sale or any other kind of sale."  Our spare room was starting to look like an episode of "Hoarders" so my husband (bless his heart) talked me into just one more garage sale.  Since we had a break between graduations, weddings and out of town company we spent the past week in the hoarder room evaluating and marking items that were garage sale worthy.  Almost everything made the cut and out to the driveway we toted it for an early opening on Saturday morning. We invited the unique breed of  garage sale folks to our driveway to peruse our unwanted household goods, clothes, and vhs tapes.  We wheeled and dealed with each other over pennies and managed to sell a good portion of it.  All said and done we made $235 and I had to concede to my husband that he was right.  It was worth it and I did enjoy all the chatting and negociating. Just for the record my statement "I will never have another yard sale, garage sale or tag sale or any other kind of sale." still stands... at least in principle.  

This is about a third of what we started with.

We had a steady stream of people all day.

Negociating a good deal

We couldn't have done it without the muscles. Thanks guys!

Poirot on love...

"Am I so calculating, Madam.  Am I the solver of puzzles with a heart that is cold, or are we looking at the greatest of mysteries that life ever throws out, a mystery that  even I, Hercule Poirot, would not be able to solve... the nature of love."  (Poirot in The Third Girl to his good friend Madam Oliver)

So true, Mssr. Poirot, so true.

Rachel's Married!

 Rachel is married!  We knew Justin was the "one" when our beautiful, intelligent, sensible, career-minded daughter described him as the most athletic, handsome, perfect, wise man she had ever met.  Only knowing Justin through the eyes of our daughter we were pretty sure he had Greek god-like characterics.  After meeting him we realized he was a kind and caring, easy going, quiet, young man who was as in love with our daughter as she was with him.  It seems like God brought them together.  They emphasize each other's strengths and as you can see by the pictures they are genuinely in love.  I think Justin will help her find her way and vice versa. And when the difficult times come they can look back on their wedding day as a point of reference and remember how very full of love and hope they were.  The Justin and Rachel Angevine family was formed before God today and this is only the beginning of their love story, so much more is still to come.

Julia Says....

"Moderation, small helpings,sample a little bit of everything, these are the secrets of happiness and good health."

Be brave. Float the Truckee.

I've never floated the Truckee River or any river on a tube before.  I was determined to conquer my fears and do it this year.  The river was very low and we were warned that people were bailing out part way through and walking the path to their cars.  We decided to plunge in and forge ahead.  Everything was going well until I got stuck on some rocks in the middle of some death defying rapids (as death defying as you can get in ankle deep water).  I had to do a kind of half roll, half bail out of my tube maneuver and figure out how to hoist myself up using a floaty for stability in the middle of rushing (yes, only ankle deep) water. I tell you that is not easy to do! Once I was in an upright position I had to pick my way over slippery rocks with wobbly legs to the edge of the river. After clinging to the side and waiting for my legs to quit shaking I picked my way down the river until the water was deep enough to get back into the tube.  The kids seemed oblivious to my struggles and were laughing and having a good time.  Most of the time I was hanging on to Rob's and Laura's boat for dear life.  Poor Rob, can you imagine trying to navigate a rubber raft with a huge dory attached using one little paddle?  After a couple of these harrowing experiences I decided to bail out and walk the path.  I know it sounds like I gave up, but I didn't, not really. As I was walking that mile or two back to our cars I was smiling from ear to ear.  I had done it!  I floated the Truckee River just like everyone else.  I jumped in despite my fears and participated in life instead of watching from the sidelines.  The river was a little to low to float that day and everyone else bailed out shortly after I did.
Rob broke his oar and the boat was punctured, I left my keys back at camp and we lost a couple of our teen boys for a while but all I could think was ...I did it!

PS  Rob, you are a good friend  to weather that Jonah-trip down the Truckee without complaining or losing your temper. Thank you!   Laura, thanks for leading the way in the "live your life" department.  You do it so effortlessly.  While I don't have any actual pictures of us on the river here are some as we got ready to go for it.... 

Lazy Days of Summer...

The last couple of years we have been camping for the 4th of July at Lake Tahoe with great friends.  It is nice to spend time as families and leave the pressure of everyday life behind even if it is just for a few days. I love this trip and I love the Parks!  Hope everyone had a great Independence Day!  Enjoy the pics....

Journaling

One of the things I learned in Weight Watchers was the importance of keeping a Food Journal. I've heard testimony after testimony of people who have lost a significant amount of weight claim that keeping a food journal even after weight loss is key to keeping it off. Rachel told me about this great website where you can track your meals and your physical activity. The best part is it's free! http://www.livestrong.com/myplate/ Livestrong recently created a new website just for diabetics. It helps track your glucose levels as well. http://www/livestrong.com/diabetes-journal Another great website that you can personalize and track your food is http://www.mypyramid.gov/ This website is also packed full of great articles and helpful advice. Thanks to Jackie and nursing school for turning me on to that one.

Happy journaling everyone!

Hmm...A New Perspective

I've been feeling a little narcissistic about writing this blog. It seemed like enough for it to be all about me and my thoughts, but I'm uncomfortable with that and I guess I'm glad I am. After all what could be more boring than someone who talks non stop about themselves?! Sooo... I'm going to write to an audience, of at least 1 (thanks Rachel!). In my mind, this blog is written to anyone who wants to get out of their comfort zone, up off the couch, face their fears and make little changes that will hopefully add up to a big change. So fellow change makers what's on your mind?

Disciplines of the Beautiful Woman: A List!

One of my favorite books ever is Disciplines of the Beautiful Woman by Anne Ortlund. (1977) I've probably read it a dozen times over the last 25 years. The following is a great list Anne originated about "putting first things first."

Start now. Here is a list of things you can do when you're tempted to dawdle--or watch TV indiscriminately."

1. Exercise.
2. Memorize Scripture.
3. Look over your coming calendar, and prepare what to wear.
4. Give yourself a pedicure.
5. Write a list of your blessings.
6. Walk around your house critically: adjust, rearrange, throw out, give away.
7. Cook ahead for the freezer.
8. Cream yourself all over.
9. Read part of an important book.
10. Clean out our cosmetics drawer.
11. Write a letter to an old friend.
12. Do your nails.
13. Weed your garden.
14. Bring your recipe file up to date.
15. Encourage a Christian friend by telephone, someone don't usually call.
16. Put all those old photos into albums.
17. Take a walk in the park.
18. Nap on a slant board, or with your feet up.
19. Have a prolonged time talking with God: partly on your knees, partly standing with hands
raised, partly on your face before him on the floor.
20. Polish the silver.
21. Write a poem (don't be silly; everybody does).
22. Write your pastor an encouraging note.

Just a Thought

I keep ruminating on Pastor Joel's sermon this week. It was on Hebrews chapter 12:12-17.

"...Pursue peace with all men, and the sanctification without which no one will see the Lord. See to it that no one comes short of the grace of God; that no root of bitterness springing up causes trouble, and by it many be defiled; that there be no immoral or godless person like Esau, who sold his own birthright for a single meal. For you know that even afterwards, when he desired to inherit the blessing, he was rejected, for he found no place for repentance, though he sought for it with tears."

Esau was a man who lived a very earthly life. He lived by his senses especially for hunting and eating. He took his position of firstborn lightly and even sold his very precious birthright for a single meal and afterwards sought the blessing with tears. He regretted what he did but didn't repent from it. How heartbreaking! A couple of phrases that Joel spoke keep resonating in my head. One is "Don't trade what is lasting for what is momentary." and the other is "There are certain choices which cannot be unmade and certain consequences which not even God will take away." How painfully apropos this is to my life! Sometimes I feel like I have lived for the momentary pleasure of a cookie or some other instant gratification. Then I seek God with tears and want Him to take away the consequences(ie. obesity and diabetes)! The obvious message here is: Spend my time seeking God and the things of God instead of giving in to the instant gratifications of the world (ie. whatever food or distraction is before me). I'm feeling raw.

Thank you Lord for your discipline and humbling in my life. Thank you for likening my Christian walk to a race. It isn't easy and sometimes the hills seem too high or I hit the "wall" and it takes more than I have within me to keep going, but I know that the prize is at the end. One day I'll stand at the finish line and see my Lord and Savior Jesus Christ. The hope of that day is like a cool drink of water and a energy bar. Thank you for your grace. You have wiped out my mistakes and have given me a fresh new day to tie on the running shoes and get cracking! There is no other like You!

Weigh In Monday.

This Monday was not exciting like last week. I gained back two of the 6.9 pounds. It was not wholly unexpected, I sneaked a cookie here and there and fell off keeping my journal. I'm not going to use this as an excuse to turn back to the old easy ways. I'm done with those days. I've had a lot of victories this week. The biggest was I continued to walk every day and have even been expanding my walks to get in a few more steps. The cool thing is I'm not obliged to expand my walks, it is just happening naturally. I think, "Hey, I still feel good, I'll walk over there or take that trail just to see where it goes." Maybe I'm an really an adventurer at heart?!

Another good thing I realized this week was that I am surrounded with great encouragers in my own family. All three of my daughters are so supportive. They are always ready to take a walk with me or have worked out coffee drinks at Starbucks that are still tasty but not calorie laden or do their nails with Mom while watching tv 'because one can't snack with wet nails'. I've received daily texts from each of them just to encourage me or ask how my walks are going. The really neat thing is none of them know the others are also doing the same thing! Every stage of their lives, the good and the challenging (with the exception of potty training) have been precious and now that they are young women I am being blessed by them!

I'm claiming the week as a success based on the great walks and encouragment. I will tighten up my diet and dust off the food journal. No excuses, no going back.

Title Nine and ABA

Title Nine is a sportswear catalog. The models are healthy and active real people. I'm not sure if it's the clothes or the lifestyle they represent, but perusing the pages always inspires me. www.TitleNine.com

A great source for workout gear for the larger woman, like myself is ABA. It stands for A Big Attitude. They supply those great shorts and sports bras for The Biggest Loser show . I have purchased several items from them and love them all. I just wish all my clothes were as comfortable as my ABA gear! www.abigattitude.com

What's Up With That?!

Today wasn't such a good day. I ate sooo much food! It wasn't even great food, just available food. I woke up late and had a house full of teenage boys. (impromptu slumber party on my son's part) Instead of enjoying having young people around I allowed myself to stall. I can't believe this happened after such a great weight loss yesterday. It's almost like I sabotaged myself. Why did I do this?
Turning back is not an option, so I went for a walk tonight. No more eating tonight and right back in the saddle tomorrow. Maybe taking two steps back and recognizing it, is really one step forward.

Walking along Governor's Trail

This morning we walked along Governor's Trail. Carson City is trying to become a destination for bicyclers. This path was very nice and a great start toward that goal. We ended up walking about 5 miles. My daughter, Valerie, even came along. Walking with friends is much more fun than slugging it out by my self!

Weigh In Day

Weighed in today and I can't believe it! The scale says I've lost 6.9 pounds! Unbelievable, but I weighed twice so I'm going with it. Yay!

I Love Lists!

I love lists. I don't know why, maybe because they represent attaining the unattainable. Just having a tangible list of mini goals is like having a jumping off place to achieve big things and live a full life. Here's a list I made a couple of years ago:

Top Ten Reasons to Lose Weight

1. To represent my God and my Faith
2. To get off Meds for my health
3. To set a good example for my children
4. To look good for my husband
5. To live my life- hiking, kayaking, biking, swimming-maybe even running
6. To have a nice wardrobe
7. To be thin when we take our anniversary trip to Hawaii
8. To gain self confidence-I would like to live one day not feeling like I am fat
9. To make a difference in my grandchildren's life
10. To get a job

Mom's in Touch Hiking Club

Once a week several praying moms are going to do a summer hiking club:


1. Mexican Ditch Trail

2. Linear Trail by Governor's Field

3. C Hill Trail

4. Longbranch

5. Spooner Lake Trail

This will be a lot of fun with some very good friends. Can't wait to get cracking!

El Camino del Rey [High Quality]

Hiking is an obvious choice for a fun way to keep fit, especially since I live next to the Sierra Nevada Mountains. El Camino del Rey is a trecherous hike in Spain that was built in 1906. It has since come into disrepair and is illegal to hike, but that doesn't stop thrill seekers from taking on the challenge. Pretty good odds that you won't EVER see me making this hike!

To Diet or not to Diet?

Weight Watchers, Cambridge, Atkins, Weight Watchers, Cabbage Soup, South Beach, Weigh Down Workshop, Tops, Weight Watchers... I've been on all these diets and probably some that I've forgotten. To tell the truth, they all worked. I lost weight on all of them. The thing I couldn't do was keep the weight off.


Changing one's behavior for good seems to be the key. My daughter, Jackie, is a naturally thin person. She occasionally gets "puffy" like the rest of us, but the difference is she knows that at a certain weight she feels good and functions at her best. When her weight creeps up around 5 pounds or so over that, she just naturally cuts back and increases her exercise. I've seen her do it many times even as a young girl. The question is, how to channel Jackie?


Already, keeping a food diary has revealed that I'm consuming a lot more food than I realized. Diets are a thing of the past, just eating less, staying away from carby stuff and no grazing between meals will be the new plan. Eating smaller meals throughout the day instead of a lot of food at one sitting is a hard habit to change. Maybe just being aware of it will be a good start.

Doctor's Ultimatum

I Went to see Dr C.,the Endocrinologist, yesterday and received the ultimatum that medically she has done all she can do and my blood glucose numbers are still hitting the 200's. The ball is now in my court, diet and exercise and losing some weight is my only option. The unspoken word between us was "insulin." I really don't want to become dependant on insulin.

In addition to diet and exercise I'm supposed to keep a food diary. The good thing about Dr. C. is she's a little scary so maybe I can keep up with a food journal. I've tried keeping them before and I'm good for about three days, but going back to see her without a completed journal would be unthinkable.

My daughter tells me that once I get into the habit of exercising I'll love it and will look forward to it. I'm not so sure. This morning I walked with my not-so-miniature schnauzer, Cash. The pedometer said it was just over 6000 steps. It wasn't so bad.

Aaugh!

Reality Smack!

On June 5th my daughter graduated from High School. It was a beautiful sunny day, the ceremony was short and sweet and my daughter was beaming from ear to ear. Family came in from out of town so we had a celebratory reception at our home. All in all, it was a fun day and we took a lot of photos which my brother-in-law kindly downloaded to my computer. The next couple of weeks were spent playing tourist: Yosemite, Lake Tahoe, Donner Park, Reno river walk, and museums. Now that the company has gone home and our house has been set straight I sat down with a caramel latte and started looking at the photos. there was this photo of a very heavy woman who looks like she is about 9 months pregnant with twins and she was wearing my clothes! My reality smack was, yes that woman is me. I decided then and there to DO something about this and not just DREAM about doing something. June 5th was also my 51st birthday. If not now, then when?